Nameless Kitten photos...

Still nameless, but now photographed :)

Saturday

Lovely day!


Dad's early-ish to help with more clearing out, packing and shifting hay bales.  Worked about 6 hours there.


Went to the RSPCA and we now have a new 3mth old kitten (to be named!) which is currently trying to make friends with our 2.5 year old cat (Missy).


I made a bacon and rice fritatta. Now this is news as it is a bit of a step forward for me.  I don't like eggs.  I have been trying to introduce them but it's been tough.  But as a coeliac there are many times when it would be so helpful if I ate them.  A few weeks ago at my glass slumping class I ate my first fritatta and was surprised how much I liked it.  I found a recipe and made my own tonight.  And it was fine!  Next step is an omelette...  but the rice fritatta is a good forward step in the meantime!


Now watching footy on the TV while laughing at the antics of our cats....   Missy (the older one) is being grumpy but is coming around by the minute.

Oops - not myself?

It seems my extreme tiredness was gluten related this week.
It has finally worn off (after a day off work today and 15 hours sleep).


So a few things will now happen:

• I will find it easier to make good food choices without my body calling out for energy dense foods
• My attitude will improve
• My energy levels will improve

Can't argue with those improvements!

A small dilemma

I really want a wardrobe revamp.... I want to shop with a personal stylist...  I have set aside some money from my tax return to do this...  but part of me is holding back.


My concerns include:

• wasting money I should put towards our mortgage buffer
• trying to look good when losing weight would achieve the same
• no clothes at my size looking good anyway
• what if I don't like the stylists style...  I can decide not to buy the clothes but her hourly rate has to be paid anyway

My reasons to want to do it:

• I believe feeling confident will help me lose weight
• I have to wear clothes what ever my weight so I may as well look the best I can while losing weight and not wait for goal
• the ideas I am taught for dressing for my shape will still apply when I am slim as my basic shape will not change

My options:

• Just do it
• Book it for January (sales) and hope to have lost more weight by then (but not set it as a reward, book it regardless)
• Forget it until I am slim and decide then if I even need it

Opinions?

The 'enemy'

Something Sean (link) wrote the other day really resonated with me.

Food is NOT the enemy.

What Sean wrote about was realising that he was the reason he was overweight, not food.

I am probably repeating Sean in what I am going to write, but I need to put my thoughts in my words....

I am not the enemy either.  This is my life.  Not a war.

Food is a requirement for life.

Food can be healthy (or not), delicious (or not) but it is always going to be part of my life.

Making food a negative in my life won’t ever work, or at least not for long.

My journey to becoming the best me is mainly an internal one.   It is about changing the way I think and behave.

One of the key changes for me is about changing my approach from a battle plan to a series of personal goals.

Another is learning to accept who I am now, that the journey to the best me is part of my life, not a break from life where everything else is on hold until I become a new and improved me.

Food is not the enemy, and neither am I.

Random thoughts - in 3 parts

An observation

My body is pretty clever.

Aside from the obvious breathing, beating, healing, growing, moving and feeling that is.

It tells me clearly what it needs.

Sometimes I can’t give it what it needs.

So it tells me what I can substitute.

I am learning to really listen to it.

And it is pretty clever.

~*~*~*~*~*~

Me update

My past few days have been a bit all over the place.

Friday night I went to the footy – first final – and my team won with a last minute free kick.  The emotional roller coaster of the last 10 minutes of the game was exhilarating to say the least!

Then Saturday we cancelled the trip to Dad’s.  He needed a weekend off.  So we went to the RSPCA (still no cat or dog that we both loved), gluten free shop, supermarket and shopping for fathers day.  Then we relaxed for the rest of the afternoon and evening.  Great day.

Sunday started slowly, then we headed off to lunch for Father’s Day.  Had a fantastic meal at Rockpool and managed to stay for 4 hours!  I love spending time with my family.  I ate naturally.  I ordered food I love and ate to the point of satisfaction not fullness.  The food was amazing, but the company was why I was there.  Watching my Dad make paper planes for my nephew, teasing my brother about his girlfriends, talking clothes and accessories with my sister.  That is what makes a great fathers day.

When we got home I fell asleep on the couch.  Ian woke me about 10:30pm after nearly 4 hours sleep.  Of course I then could not get back to sleep until 3am!  7am alarm nearly killed me, I was so sleepy.  I felt drugged!  I am guessing I either had a virus or ate something with gluten over the weekend. 

This is where I had to really listen to my body.  It wanted sleep but I had to go to work.  And instead of heading for high energy food to keep me awake I went for nuts and seeds.  I was really glad I did that as I felt much better.  I was flat out at work all day, didn’t leave until 8pm, but other than dozing in the taxi I slept in my normal pattern last night and woke feeling normal again today.

But I am having nuts and seeds for breakfast again anyway.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Food and smiles

I am working on liking eggs – being coeliac having eggs for breakfast would be a great option for me.  I just don’t like them!  But when I did my glass slumping class I had an Italian style omelette with rice in it and really enjoyed it!  I found a recipe over the weekend so will try making it myself soon.  That would be great as I think I can work my way from things like that to things with more egg and less things to hide the flavour and texture!

That is also where the ‘listen to my body but find substitutes’ comes in.  Sometimes there are limited gluten free options so I need to find the one that most closely matches what my body needs.  Fresh fruit, vegetables, meat, nuts and seeds are all gluten free so it is not that hard…  you just have to watch how things are prepared if you are not cooking yourself.

And sometimes I eat purely for joy.  The MCG has gluten free meat pies and that is a footy tradition I have had to live without for a long time.  So when it is finals time and I am at the MCG to watch the Saints I indulge in a gf pie.  Not because my body needs it but because it makes me smile.

This may make no sense...

My title was going to be: Parallel Journeys

But I am not even sure anyone else will follow my random ramblings... so I renamed it.

Becoming the best me is a holistic journey.   It is physical, mental, emotional and spiritual.

The old way:

In 2008 I got to my goal weight by following weight watchers but without changing my thought processes.  It was actually really easy.  But I didn’t stay at goal.  In fact it took 8 months to lose 54lb and 8 months to put it back on.  I was at goal for about 4 weeks in total.

A few times after that I lost some weight but it always went back on. 

I often went back to weight watchers, but I struggled to make progress for more than a month at a time.

Then in about 2004 I discovered and started changing the subconscious beliefs that were stopping me staying at my best weight.

I spent a lot of time discovering and changing these ideas that had taken hold. 

Then I went back to weight watchers and still struggled to make progress for more than a month at a time.

So I went back to a psychologist and dealt with more issues.

And then I went back to weight watchers and still struggled to make progress for more than a month at a time.

Then I found out I had ADD.  I was put on ADD medication and also had more therapy.  I learned more about myself than I ever had before.

And then I went back to weight watchers and still struggled to make progress for more than a month at a time.

In between weight watchers attempts I also tried a variety of other weight loss methods (excluding crash diets!).  None succeeded.

The new way:

In the past few months my approach has changed quite a bit.

It needed to.

I had to change some more beliefs. 

Just because weight watchers got me to my goal weight once 12 years ago does not mean it is the way I will get to my healthy weight and stay there.  Just because ‘eating when hungry’ seems too simple does not mean it doesn’t work.  Just because my weight loss is more slow than steady does not mean I will not reach goal faster than sticking to a ‘plan’ for a month then feeling like garbage for not sticking to it for the next 11 months.  If it takes 11 years that is success given I have not got there trying other methods in the past 12 years.

I do not have to sort out one part of ‘me’ at a time.  I can lose weight, get strong, discover my artistic side, consider career options, discover new friends, rediscover old friends, read self help books, and change hair styles all in parallel. 

This may mean that this week I move forward more in one area than another.  But next week that might change again.  It might mean that today I am busy at work and don’t really improve anything expect my overtime.  And that is ok.

I have identified 2 non negotiables for now:  daily breakfast and 3 times per week floor work.

These will be added to over time.  When I am ready for the next step. 

This is my life.  I choose the path I take on any given day.  This is not a race. 

Because even as I am right now, today, I am ok.  If nothing changes I am still a good person.  Some people even like me just the way I am.  They won’t like me any more or less if I am slim or fit or a painter or a runner.