Get out of my head!!

Too much swimming around in my head - so afraid you get a brain dump to read!

Can I squeeze in a trip to my hairdressers to fix my new fringe (it's too long and not full enough) or do I go to a local one?

What should I wear to my 40th?  It's a BBQ at home...  I need a new top to wear with jeans...  uugghhh I hate top shopping... (yes losing more weight would help!)

Should we go get a dog Saturday or is that silly with the working bee at Dad's on Sunday and then the BBQ here next Saturday?  Should we wait?  What if the two cute dogs I have my eye on are gone in 2 weeks...  uggghhh!

Why did DH hide my birthday gift in the cupboard in my exercise room??  I was looking for a book not my gift!  At least it is something I wanted!

Why does my back hurt?  Stress?  Sitting too long at work today?  Wonder how long before the nurofen kicks in?

Should I take my birthday off work (and lose a days pay) or go to work?

Ok, I think that is it...

Night all!

Quick Update

I slept well last night!  I was going to sleep in the spare bed as I was so stressed about keeping DH awake, but he convinced me to stay in our bed and I am glad I did cos there was no coughing and no stomach issues so I slept and so did he!

Amazing how much better a good nights sleep makes you feel!

Today I even feel slimmer.  Not slim.  Still obese.  But my clothes feel a little less clingy.

I had an interesting issue yesterday.   I was cold.  And I seem to have no indoor warm clothing!  I have outdoor coats and jackets.  But only one jumper/pullover (which was in the wash).  What did I wear last year??  Was I never cold?  So today I hope to find some cheap warm clothing to wear at home etc when I feel cold.    Of course going shopping will require me to stop blogging and leave my desk…

No Sleep

My cough won’t go.

On days I am at home it is better – it doesn’t like office air apparently.

But I am keeping my DH awake.

And he has to drive all day.

Tired.

He can’t work from home like I can.

So last night there was no coughing.

But there was a stress induced stomach ache.

Which had me out of bed and in a warm bath at 3am.

Which woke up DH.

And he told me to come back to bed.

Which I misunderstood.

He sleeps badly when I am not beside him.

But last night he just wanted me to stay in one place.

Sadly I stayed beside him but could not get comfortable. 

My stomach ache came with it’s very own back ache.

So DH slept badly from 3am.

At 5:30 when he got up, exhausted, I cried.

I am exhausted too. 

But I can work from home.

I suggested he have a day off but he declined.

What if he has an accident?

Stress.

Tonight if I can’t sleep I will close the bedroom door and do what I need to do.

Without disturbing him.

I need sleep so badly.

So does he.

Sunday

A very quick blog.  An emotional day yesterday (nothing bad happened, just emotional).  12 hours sleep last night.  And another small but steady loss today.  

PS

Jack of http://jackfit.blogspot.com/ has posted some photos I sent in to him on his blog.

I read his WIDTH blog last week and felt an urgent need to send in photos of my own.  Immediately.  Even with my scruffy hair and make up free face.  I used eye liner and lip liner to go over the words when they didn't show up in pen rather than find something else.  Not sure why the urgency...  makes for some great 'looking my worst' photos though!!

The past year

Last year I was diagnosed with mild ADD.  At the age of 39.  Most people who know me would not think I had ADD.  I am intelligent (I can say that cos Mensa accepted me :p) and learned lots of ways to compensate.  

Having said that, being diagnosed and being on ADD medication has drastically changed me.  On the inside.

My external behaviour has barely changed.

But I now know myself so much better than I ever have.

I always tried to understand myself – I loved self help books and magazines.

For the first time I now feel that I kind of know who I am and how I work.

It’s a nice feeling.

And through this knowledge I have stopped banging my head against the brick wall that was my weight loss efforts.  I know what works for me and I am sticking to that.  It’s slow, but it works for me.

Of course there is still a lot to learn.  I am complicated :p

But it is good to know I am making progress!

The photos

This may only make sense if you read yesterdays word pictures!

I never realised how much more I would 'see' with a camera in my hand!

I noticed different buildings.

I noticed that Gucci and Louis Vuitton are on the two corners opposite two of the churches.  All kinds of religions :p

It was fun!!

"Federation Square"

"Church # 1"

More of Federation Square

The circus tent I saw from the train - today the train didn't stop but I saw it again on my walk!

I never noticed this building before today!

The right hand window view from the train yesterday - taken as I walked past on my way to work today!

See the security guard poking his face out from the doorway?  I thought he would be gone today!  The eagle is part of the Grand Hyatt Hotel entrance.

Church # 2

Church # 3

Collins St :)

The office atrium - my desk just visible behind the light

My messy desk

Reminders of my goals :)